Bill: Draft Eliminate the cacophonous scourge of clucking nightmares Act

[EATB]

CONGRESS OF THE
COMMONWEALTH OF REDMONT

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A BILL TO

AMEND THE CRIMINAL CODE TO BAN ANIMAL ABANDONMENT ON PUBLIC LAND

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The people of the Commonwealth of Redmont, through their elected Representatives in the Congress and the force of law ordained to that Congress by the people through the constitution, do hereby enact the following provisions into law:
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PART I — PRELIMINARIES

1. Short Title and Enactment

(1) This Act may be cited as the ‘Eliminate the cacophonous scourge of clucking nightmares Act’

(2) This Act shall be enacted immediately upon its signage.

(3) This Act has been authored by Representative EATB.

(4) This Act has been co-sponsored by President of the Senate Talion77 and Speaker of the House xXTheoryXx.

(5) This Act amends the following acts:

(a) Criminal Code Act

2. Reasons and Intent

(1) The current Animal Abandonment offence only criminalises leaving an animal in an area "without the consent of the property owner," which technically only applies to private or rented property.

(2) Players abandoning animals on public land, such as spawn, roads, or government buildings, causes clutter, lag, and aesthetic issues for the server, and is a public nuisance to the highest order. This has occurred recently, with our beloved Commonwealth under siege by a feathered insurgency of unparalleled proportions. These wretched, clucking nightmares are a plague of downy, beaked demons, a cacophonous, mindless tide of squaking filth that stains our streets with their rhythmic, soul-crushing "bawk-bawk" chorus. Their little white, yellow, red, pixelated bodies haunt the subconscious visual cortex and nightmares of every Redmontian. They are vectors, agents of chaos, wandering aimlessly with their fruitless existence into government buildings, polluting our streets, staring with their cold, dead, obsidian eyes, committing their relentless, unapologetic atrocities of sanitation. We must terminate and annihilate this full-scale biological occupation by these flightless, aggressive miscreants, and end the tyranny of public-space poultry once and for all by criminalising the mass abandonment of these feathery agents of chaos and disorder, and other potential rogue entities, across our beloved nation.

(3) This amendment explicitly expands the offence to eliminate the abandonment of animals on public land.

PART II — AMENDMENTS TO THE CRIMINAL CODE

3. Amendments to Animal Abandonment

(1) Section 6 of PART V: DISRUPTING THE PEACE of the Criminal Code Act shall be amended as follows:

6 - Animal Abandonment
Offence Type: Summary
Penalty: 1 Penalty Units 5 Penalty Units per animal; confiscation of animal
A person commits an offence if the person:
(a) leaves an animal in an area without the consent of the property owner. on private land without the consent of the property owner; or
(b) leaves an animal on public land, plot, building, or territory, not designated for agricultural purposes without express government permission.
Relevant Law: